Since I've been back in LA jet lag has not been my friend. I remember it taking me at least a week to readjust last time, but I'm hoping the process will pass a lot quicker this time. Since I was feeling a bit down & since there is a TV pilot currently gearing up to be filmed around the couch I'm crashing on I decided to take a little stroll to Farmers Market. My teacher often talks about it in his books as a great place to sit & observe people's mannerisms. Today I was just blown away by all the different stalls, but I'm planning to go back again very soon & observe all the different characters that make it such a bustling melting pot of cultures.
I've recently been gearing up for another trip to LA. Despite feeling excited about returning to my training I have been experiencing some feelings of apprehension. I guess I'm feeling nervous because I am going for much longer this time as well as the fact that I'm using this trip to cement my decision about whether to make LA my new home. At least for a year or two. It seems my subconscious has been helping me work through this nervousness by bringing me a beacon of hope in the form of Anthony Kiedis. It sounds unusual, but I have been dreaming about him a bit lately in the form of a spirit guide through some pretty trippy California adventures. When I'm sent these types of spiritual gifts I enjoy exploring them & through my exploration I stumbled upon the documentary Funky Monks. It's a great watch about the Red Hot Chilli Pepper's process towards the making of Blood Sugar Sex Magik. Of course most people watch it because of the fascination surrounding John Frusciante. I found what I learnt about all the band members to be extremely compelling. I especially connected to Kiedis' explanation of the song Under the bridge. It got me thinking perhaps he was coming to me in my dreams because my experiences have mirrored his & I am now embarking on my own journey to find "the place I love".
What is it about leaving home that makes you completely forget what made you happy before you left? For the last couple of months I've been completely missing in action. I've also been quite up & down emotionally. Struggling to feel connected to the small things that used to light up my day. In June I was blessed enough to go on an amazing trip to LA where I walked the streets of the city enjoying the Cali summer sunshine, met the most amazing people on a once in a lifetime acting jamboree & worked super hard to soak up every last drop of beautiful energy my trip had to offer. When I returned I felt a surge of motivation & energy to achieve both in my acting & everyday life. With the support of my boyfriend I moved out of the house we'd shared for the last couple of years & into the city to live with one of my childhood friends. I had taken the first leap, I had shook things up, I was now in the middle of it all & yet there was something missing. In all the excitement of my return I had forgotten about blogging. It seems so trivial when you're doing it. It's a few photos & a couple of silly little notes about your life that you are sharing with the entire internet community, but apparently for me it had offered something a bit more important. I had created a space of self expression, where I can post whatever I want, whenever I want. I can appreciate & share those things that although small mean a whole heap to me ۞